Communication Numbers – Spouses


The Communication Numbers Chart is there to help you figure out what could be helpful when help is offered. Just look at the list of feeling words, and the descriptions of the body feeling that goes with it. Then, in the third row you will find a list of things that could be helpful. Better yet, make a copy for your partner, then ask them instead of asking, “How are you doing?” ask “What number are you at.” This will give them the idea of what is going on in your body and mind with out having to try to find the right words.

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Communication Numbers – Spouses Postpartum Pro Tip (one of my MOST popular in stories):
By the end of the day often times the language I have to express my needs has disappeared. I’ve spent time talking and explaining to little ones all day, end I’m often emotionally exhausted.So Joseph and I sat down and created the number system!

At the end of the day, he texts to ask what number I am. I reply with a number 1-10. TOGETHER we’ve created a chart for what that means.

Sometimes I’m a 9… I’m playful and ready to tackle a new project together! I have supper ready and the house clean.

Other times life is at a 3. I’m feeling tense and frantically trying to pull the pieces of our home together, the kids are probably watching a movie at that point and everything is probably wrecked. At that point he WANTS to dive in and be helpful, the chart helps him know EXACTLY what will be helpful!!

We have it written out so when I say 9, 6, or 3 he knows what to expect. Removing the uncertainty of what lies behind the door when he gets home has been a game-changer for us!!

Last time I talked about this someone said both she and her husband have number charts… if the numbers don’t add up to 10 they order pizza or do movie night!! We are in the process of making him a chart too!!

If this “Communication Numbers – Spouses” makes sense to you, please SHARE it with another friend who is also postpartum!
In stories, I’ll add a link to sign up for the whole chart!

If you had to guess, what is your number right now? What word would you use to describe that number?


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