This is the season that I carried this boy deep under my heart. It has been four years since I first reached for your hand and you wrapped your fist around my finger. Birthdays are such amazing things. You my sweet baby have gone from perfectly formed and unseen, to my arms where I wept at the beauty of every perfectly formed eyelash and finger. I marveled at the creases of your little ears and the tiny perfectly shaped nose.
The sweetest thing is that you love for me to tell you that story. You come to me with long eyelashes and big brown eyes and say “Mommy, tell me about when I came out of your tummy!” I tell you about all the love that I had for you. I tell you about how we got your room ready and how everyday I wanted to hold you in my arms. I tell you how excited we were when we found out you were coming and how we held you and snuggled you. We wrapped you in the softest blankets and took you home with us. Your favorite part of the story is when I tell you the first thing you did when you got home was to pee on our bed. Your sense of humor cracks me up.
Last year we went to our birth class before Cedric was born. When you heard us talking about how I nearly cried at the thought of going into labor again. You asked sweetly, “Mommy, why did you cry?” I tried to explain with out too much detail that when he came out of my tummy it hurt very bad. Gently he patted my face and said, “Mommy, I am so sorry I hurt you.” With that caress a big part of the fear was swept away with the overwhelming love.
I can’t wait to continue this journey hand in hand with you. It has been an incredible journey to watch your awareness waken. With your kind gentle spirit I do not fear growing old, because I know you will come along side of me, take my hand, and keep me safe! Kisses to you my boy.